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Archiver > TMG > 2001-09 > 0999465587


From: "Roland Achee" <>
Subject: Re: [TMG] Step children and MAILMEN and Philosophic Musings
Date: Sun, 2 Sep 2001 16:19:47 -0500
References: <003101c133ec$90d410c0$c40aa8c0@swbell.net>


Hi Mike and all,

I agree with you that the passing of family character traits of love,
compassion and unselfishness are very important in our lives. But....(and
tell me if I am reading your message wrong)...are you saying and if so, do
you believe it to be right, to say that John Smith (who was adopted and took
the Smith name) should be listed as having been given birth to by Susan
Smith, when Susan never gave birth to him at all? Again, I could be reading
you wrong...and my apologies if I am.

I have a cousin and his wife that had 2 natural children. Then they adopted
a child. If I were in his place, I would want my adopted child, whom I
would love and cherish as much as the 2 my wife and I have, to be included
in any family book as part of his family. As a family historian and
genealogist, however, I would have a problem with listing his wife as the
child's mother, since she did not give birth to him. Not only would it be a
false statement, but it also discounts for the adopted child the fact that
another woman gave birth to him and that out there in this world, his
correct mother may still be around, and if she isn't, it still discounts her
totally.

This situation has slightly bugged me for many years (in preparation for
putting together a family book), and I am still debating how I would go
about this. The argument that is winning at this point is that I would want
my book to be as accurate as possible, and stating the truth is of the
utmost importance. That said, neither would I want to leave out adopted
children who are loved and cared for by all the people in my book. As you
said, love and compassion are important "traits" passed down also.

Buck

Roland "Buck" Achée
http://www.acadiangenealogy.com
Researching Achee-Hachey-Hache-Gallant-Theriot-Dugas

Instant Messenger=Swampfoxblue

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